How can I have a more peaceful divorce?

Divorce can be a painful and challenging time, especially when children are involved, and both spouses are experiencing a lot of anger over the end of their marriage.

However, relationship experts stress that there are several steps you can take to stem the hurt you are feeling and make the process go more smoothly, which can have emotional, physical and financial benefits.

Four ways to make your divorce easier on you and your family

While there are thorny issues to address during the process, consider these tips before you file for divorce:

  • Determine divorce is the best or only option: Couples going through a difficult time can often be pushed towards divorce by family members or friends even though they may be able to work through troublesome issues. Divorce is final, so make sure you believe there is no other choice but to end your marriage.
  • Respect each other: This can be a challenge for couples, especially if addiction or infidelity is involved. While your attorney will aggressively represent you if litigation is necessary, a contentious process will take longer and be more expensive. Working with your spouse can also save you and your children from additional emotional wounds.
  • Find common ground: If children are involved, agree to make them the top priority and work for a resolution that will benefit them and the rest of your family. Share your goals with your attorney to maintain a civil and respectful process.
  • Decide what type of process you want: Many couples are ready to take their fight to court without considering the other options available, which can be easier financially and mentally. Couples can choose to go through mediation to reach a fair settlement. Others prefer a collaborative divorce, a voluntary process that keeps the proceedings out of a courtroom, which helps many couples keep their business private and respectful.

Seek realistic legal guidance during a divorce

There is no one-size-fits-all strategy for divorce, and the process will affect everyone differently. An experienced family law attorney here in California can answer your questions and work with you to determine the best way to resolve your situation, either through a reasonable settlement or fight for your rights in court if litigation is necessary.